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I wrote this in english. . .

Tue Jun 17, 2003, 8:15 PM
This was an essay write that i did in the fall for my honors english class in the style of a speech given by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. it is based off of me and everything is true but don't try and put two and two together and figureing out who i'm referring to, cause it probably wasn't you. And now our final presentation:

I guess its easy to say you've been there and that you know where i have been, but life has never treated me as kindly as perhaps it has with you. You often tell me not to act so tough, and to let some people through, but saying it is much easier for you than it is for me to do. When you have been put down from the very start by someone you value and whose opinion you do not doubt; when your dreams that were so dear to you and then cruelly thrust away; when you have been told you can be anything you put your mind to . . . except for this and for that, because dear its just not practical; when you struggle to achieve what you think is expected, and are compared to everything you're not; when you're told to be something or do something you hate; whe you strive for perfection but fall short of the mark, with the frustration of knowing you could have and should have done more; when you're told that if you give something your all that it will simply be enough, yet when you look back at it, it just simply wasn't enough; when life just keeps throwing obstacles down in your path and you think it can't get any worse, but it does; when you told a friend in a desperate plea for help that you've considered suicide, and you thought they would help you out, yes, help was offered in the form of, "Sure i'll lend you the knife,"; when you've struggled to put your life back on track and the pain of the past behind and then two consecutive deaths in a row almost stop that chance with those two foul blows; when you're told not to cry and to hold your head high even though you're screaming inside; when the grief and the pain and the anger inside have reached their highest peak and you lash out at someone close to you without a thought in the world, and seeing them misinterpret the action and leave you staring at their back, wanting to call to them, to tell them come back, but to proud to say anything at all; when the grief finally hits you like a ton of bricks and you feel the tears welling inside, yet when the tears try to come out you find there's nothing inside; when you struggle so hard keeping up your walls to avoid the hurt and the pain, when getting to know someone is like sticking your hand in an open flame, not knowing if you'll get burned or remain unscathed; when you've been through all that and more then maybe you'll know where i've been.

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